This research aims to understand how complacency and stagnation in individual development, are related to periods of crisis in the relationship. We worked with three couples, who were attending marriage counseling. An analysis of categorial type narrative content of some sessions were considered three categories of analysis: personal satisfaction, conflicts in relationships, related to the tension that arises between individual development and partner; strategies used by couples to resolve the tension that arises between individual development and the couple, and aspects that are perceived as an obstacle to individual development